Are You Drifting Apart? Here’s What to Do

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When the special bond you have with someone begins to weaken, you may start to feel a sense of loss for the closeness you once had. Whether you are in a friendly relationship or a romantic one, here are some things to do that might be able to renew that bond.

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Do something alone together
You probably became close in the first place because you managed to get away from everyone else and do something alone together. Try doing that again. By separating yourselves from other distractions, you can focus more on each other. It becomes a good opportunity to have other bonding activities such as …

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Make new memories
In long term relationships there is a tendency to focus on ‘the good old days’ as a way of staying connected. That’s a good idea, but the reason you are recollecting those past experiences is because you made them together in the first place. Make new ones. When you do, you’re going to have more to talk about and explore about each other.

Is there tension? Address it
I had a falling out with a friend a long time ago. Once upon a time, we were as close as could be. It wasn’t until we both decided to confront that old issue that we were ever able to get past it. If you had an old argument that is still presenting a problem, do the bold thing and tackle it. If you don’t, it’s just going to grow, blow out of proportion and drive you further apart. In this process you might have to …

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Accept your differences
Being close doesn’t mean—or shouldn’t mean—being identical. That’s not very interesting (unless you’re a narcissist). As time goes by, there are going to be beliefs, opinions or decisions that you are just not going to agree on. Remember, you are unique people on your own journey through life, but you became close in the first place because you wanted to share part of that journey together.

Take up an activity together
The daily grind of life can become a bit stale and boring. A great way to introduce new challenges and topics is to take on a new activity together. While you’re at it, make it something that magnifies the good in the world, like volunteering at a public garden or a soup kitchen, or starting your own neighborhood cleanup project.

Take the hard road
Don’t let yourself get complacent. Inject something new or plan something challenging. If your friend/partner just won’t say YES to anything, do it without them but bring back stories and enthusiasm. There’s a good chance that when they see your excitement, they will want to be a part of it.

Tags: friendships, intimacy, lasting relationships